special somethings

i'm a sentimental girl compounded by a love for antiques ( hence the draw to have our wedding in a barn filled with antiques) so choosing my something old and borrowed were not difficult tasks. we had many treasures with family history incorporated into our day.

the cake topper on our cake was the cake topper my great grandmother had on her wedding cake, it was passed down to my mother only a year or so ago and the family was thrilled to have one more wedding in the generation to reuse it.

my mom is also an antiquer. when i was little i used to love looking through her boxes of vintage broaches. when i was pondering what to do with my hair, add a flower? a little veil? i revisited her box of broaches and picked one that i thought could be used as a fascinator for flower or what have you. in the end it was used to secure my lace detail, i love how personal the embellishment was, how unique to me and special to my mom.

the bone rose earrings i wore were my moms, and i also used the same purse that she used on her wedding day AND my sister used on hers.

and my something blue? my shoes of course, from Nina, i loved them...

(all photos rise photography, please do not reproduce with out proper credit)

you guys are driving me crazy...

i mentioned before that the whole guy's suit situation was one of the points causing me some major stress in this wedding planning affair. once we got mike his suit and decided what we were going to get the guys ( my brother, his brother and his best friend) i felt a lot better about the whole thing for a while, we had even stumbled upon a fantastic tie, below for those who might not remember.

the plan was for mike to pick up the other 3 ties, just like his, when he went to pick up his suit after it had been tailored. road block. the store was out of that tie. not just the harvard square store but all of the stores in all locations, the tie was completely sold out and unattainable. cut to bride spewing profanities - why on earth did we not get all 4 ties when we were there a month before? and if the ties are selling out we have to get these boys to buy their suits asap because i may have a break down if god forbid a similar situation happens with them. yeah i know - it's not good for my health to stress out about these small things but adding extra steps at this point in the game just equals stress to me.

stress. a mad search commenced for suitable replacement ties that could coordinate with mike's tie but not match exactly. i like the idea of him being a little different anyway and nothing else in this wedding is going to be matchy matchy so whats the big deal. oh yeah and we need to get something for the dad's too. am i really running around stressing over ties? oh boy it's time to get married already...

after a fruitless search for an easy order replacement i stumbled upon etsy seller hand made by emy who makes custom ties for wedding parties and has a really nice selection of fabrics. after contacting her to pick her brain about some fabrics that might mix in with our orange and blue madras design it was clear we were in good hands. i choose an orange gingham, a little bit country, a little bit casual, and a little bit funky i think for the 3 boys. i just received them in the mail today and they are beautiful. they are so well made, beautifully lined, and even wrapped in perfect little packages...oh and did i mention extremely affordable? emy really saved my day and i very highly recommend her.

we ended up ordering black and white piccolo gingham for the dads from j.crew, the orange seemed a little too young for them, and now that i have them all here i think it makes a pretty nice picture.

i have to say i do feel relieved to have one more piece of the puzzle accounted for, less than 2 months out my check lists are running long and every item taken off the table is like oxygen to me.

we now have all but one of the guys ( ehem...) suited up but it wasnt without a little extra leg work. as i had feared i went to an express to check on the vests and slacks and they did not carry the gray any longer - they were switching it out for black - the fall lines were coming in, i almost lost it. luckily we found a store in the area that still had them and walked mike's brother - his best man - in to buy it immediately. they look super cute on and i'm a happy girl - well i will be once the 3rd guy gets his but i'm on my way.

the final huge road block was the off white dress shirts. are you guys encountering any of this? since my dress is an antiqued white everyone is telling us the guys need to be in ivory or off white otherwise my dress will look dirty. great, another search. have you tried to google an ivory dress shirt? or an off white dress shirt? or even eggshell or ecru? the results are few and far between, i checked retailers, designers, even wedding message boards and forums for advice. i was pulling my hair out and about to say - screw this a white shirt is a white shirt when at express on our suiting excursion we found a perfect solution, beautiful off white shirts - called "stone" - that work perfectly.

so yeah, i can't count the times "why didnt we just rent tuxes" whispered through the back of my mind.* this part has really been a lot of work and energy for me. anyone else having any suiting troubles? the saving grace is that they do look darn cute but really, there needs to be a place that does suit rentals for the modern groom already, they could make a fortune.

* i have a friend who is getting married this weekend and when the guys went to mens wearhouse to pick up their tuxes a few days ago they all had gray jackets and black pants, so i know that a rental wouldn't necessarily mean less stress.

something blue

i finally got my blue shoes! hooray! after a bit of a struggle to find the perfect teal peep-toe my new dress actually helped dictate a little different shade for my footwear. since the gown is a little more muted this navy with a hint of gray from Nina is perfect - they got here today and they are sooo pretty!!!

i am so torn between not wanting to take them off because i love them and not wanting to take them out of the box to keep them shiny and new. oh the joys of being a girl!

wardrobe for my groom

the process of getting mike to look for and choose a suit was a huge struggle for me. i knew he wanted to wear a gray suit, and possibly a vest. after visiting men's warehouse over a year ago and being seriously unimpressed by the selection and even a little annoyed by the pushy demeanor of the sales associates (no, just because you don't have a modern cut gray suit does not mean we are going to change our minds and rent tuxes - thanks though!) mike lost interest and stamina in the hunt.

at first we were just so frustrated that no one rented suits since the modern man seems to be trending this way for special events -million dollar idea - why doesn't this exist?!

i found myself shopping for him online and holding onto my research until it had been long enough since the last suit nag (yes rationing my nagging - a great start to a marriage). we looked at zara, we looked at h&m, we looked at banana republic, express, and j.crew. the problem was this; we needed something affordable enough so that we could ask the guys to buy their own suits without putting them out too much. i was pushing express hard (they have these cute vested suits, and we still might go that route for the guys) and getting the guys their suits was one of the last giant check marks on our wedding to do list.

a little more than a week ago we went to express to try it in person - and it was cute - really cute - i thought we should walk out of the store with it and when we didn't mike finally said something that made me feel like an idiot and just embarrassed for not being more sensitive. he said that he wanted to marry me in something special. what a self absorbed bride? i have the balls to buy TWO dresses to feel and look good but i want him to settle so i can get it over with? how narrow minded of me. he wants to look like don draper. he wants to feel put together, sophisticated and sexy, and of course i want him to feel all of those things too.

the magic in this story is that the following day we went to check out j.press in harvard square - a coworker had recommended it to him after her husband found his suit there.

we enter j.press - a sea of ties, nautical themed belts, blazers with customizable harvard details and actual authentic nantucket reds. the boutique shop has been around for over a hundred years and dressed countless presidents while in office or still in their studies at the university. with very little information - color, time of year - the associate walks to a rack at the back of the store and pulls

out the perfect suit. modern, beautifully made, a gray that is not too dark and still not too summer for our september wedding, and trousers with a flat front. we finally feel like we are being taken care of by someone who knows what they are doing. as soon as the jacket went on, even over his green tootsie pop owl t-shirt i knew it was the one for him. i could tell he felt good in it and he felt like it was special enough to marry me in, a universe away from the others we had tried in the last year.

while the tailor fit him i checked out the accessories and found a tie that is just too perfect for our color scheme and overall aesthetic and mike loved it too. it has our orange, the blue to balance it, and even the cream to match my gown. we just bought one but i think we are going to go ahead and buy them for the other 3 guys as well. and now that my groom is squared away we are thinking that to save costs for the groomsmen we are going to have them just get a vest and slacks (possibly the express option above,) i think it will look cute for our rustic outdoor wedding - i love a guy in a vest with his shirt sleeves rolled up!

did any of you have a tough time finding the suiting for your grooms? if so how did you solve the problem?

get up for my girls

we are having a small wedding party to keep a simple feel to the day, keep the organization of all the bodies simple, and in all honesty keep the choosing between friends simple. we decided to basically just have our siblings stand by our sides when we say i do. my sister, his sister, my sister in law, my brother, his brother, and his boyhood friend. pretty easy.

since we have such small parties i thought i would pick a color range on J.Crew for the girls and let them decide which dresses they want since i'm not into matchy-matchy so much and the hodgepodge look would support the relaxed feel we are trying to create for our day. well, turns out when everyone is trying to be polite no one makes a move or at least thats what happened with us, so we ordered a few dresses for my sister to try on (matron of honor) and decided we liked one - done. had the girls order, they all seem to be cool with it, they weren't a fortune, and they dont need alterations! hooray!

this is what they are wearing, the much fallen back upon by brides throughout the blogosphere - the silk chiffon juliette from j.crew.

so, now that they all have the same dress i decided i was going to use jewelry to add a pop of color to the blank palette and use it as an opportunity to give them each something a little different. through three separate vendors on etsy i found three necklaces that are all very similar, have a vintage and handmade feel, but are all different.

from esty vendors sora designs, botanical bird, and aphrodite888. nice huh? i am really happy with each of them, i think the one with the blue will go to my sister to set her apart a little. the overall image is starting to come together now isn't it? very exciting stuff.

now i need to decide what else to get them. i was thinking about different cardigans since it will be september, or wraps, and then there is purses, but maybe i shouldnt give them another "wedding thing" what do you think? what are you giving your girls for gifts? are you giving them wedding accessories as a part of their gift? is that mean? should i give them something completely for them? i feel like when i have participated in weddings in the past i have had a mix, undies/cami sets, jewelry, nips, eye masks and pj's - i guess i'm just kinda stuck. i'd love to hear what you all are doing for some ideas!

the dress

i finally took some photos of myself in the dress so i could share them with my LA girlfriend and shopping buddy. she is going to help me on my shoe hunt. i was afraid to share with her but did so i thought i'd suck it up and share with you all as well.

since i've had such dress anxiety i'm a little terrified about putting it out there, like if it's not good and i dont show anyone until the day of the wedding they wont have any way to tell me they dont like it until after when it wont matter anymore. crazy i know.

that being said, i'd love to hear what you think...( but really only if you think it's pretty and i'm nuts, i can't handle any negative feedback!)

they are hidden here:

MIKE NO PEEKING

thats news to me

i just got a new piece of "wedding etiquette" that i was unaware of, and might i say have no interest in being concerned about, but i thought it worth mentioning just to see if you all have ever heard of such a thing.

did you know that the mother of the bride is to buy her dress first and then all of the other mothers are to match her in fabric choice and length? who knew? since mike's sister is also planning a wedding this is one of the tidbits we discovered together as there are two mothers on their side that are in both weddings. apparently the step mother and mother of the groom went dress shopping and the bridal boutique insisted they have a photo of the mother of the brides gown before proceeding even though they knew the color. again. who knew? the cooridination goes as far as if the MOB is wearing a bolero all should wear a bolero, really?

this led to lots of polite 'just let us know when your mom picks a gown so we can start shopping' talk, which is nice but i say - screw it! wear what you want, don't look like a bride or a bridesmaid, and dress appropriate for the formality of the event and you'll be all set, am i wrong? let's discuss.

hair hmmm...

boy, it feels good to do a post about something that hasn't been a struggle or cost us an arm and a leg. I'm starting to think about my hair.

I always thought i would wear my hair down in natural looking waves with some sort of flower or hippie headband accessory to denote myself as the bride.

(green wedding shoes)

but. today i saw a photo from when i bought my dress taken of the back with my hair up and i though - geez - do i want to cover that up? my gown is strapless and an exposed back is pretty beautiful as far as i'm concerned. (my mother always told me to accentuate your assets and hide your flaws so the back and shoulders can take over for my hips any day!)

anyway. i started to rethink, could i do some sort of loose messy looking updo instead of loose locks?

and then i saw this bride on once wed today and thought that it was meant to be. what a good combo of showing off the length and sweeping the hair off the back at the same time with this messy side braid of sorts (more photos here.)

(once wed)

what do you girls think? have you decided how you're doing your do yet?

more vegas wedding treats

remember my friend's Vegas wedding i mentioned a little while back? Well sue, the bride has posted some more photos - showcasing her amazing Whirlingturban dress - go see!via postcards from a concrete garden

signs of obsession

...yep. I see them, and it's not about anything important at all. it's shoes. boy it seems even more shameful to say it out loud - but we're all being honest here, right?

here's the thing. i love blue shoes. i had this amazing pair of vintage blue peep toe pumps that i literally wore out through my twenties in LA. i still mourn them, so much so they are at this very moment sitting, unwearable, in my childhood closet at my parents house. i know, i know. i'll move on - but i need a replacement first.

needless to say, they are my model for the perfect wedding shoe, something i adore, something very me, and something that i can wear with jeans and a tank top out on the town long after my "big day" has passed.

well, after lots of hunting i found them, the color is a little different, perfect for my off white gown and rustic farm location, the embellishment is feminine and pretty enough for a wedding but not too foofy or bedazzled for every day wear AND they are on sale.

they are called 'reservations for two' sweet right? well, to my frustration this shoe was a 2008 model and i can't find it in my size anywhere! i've even contacted the manufacturer. so sad. but, at least i have a basis of comparison.

so, here comes the obsession. i find myself spending down time during the day alternating between searching for blue or teal pumps, peep-toes, shoes, and every other variation of terminology i can think to put into the browser to find a replacement or the illusive 'reservations for two.' Have any of you caught yourself doing this? Maybe for a dress or some other detail that has a hold on you?

well, today i found something that i think might work as an alternative, even from the same manufacturer (yes, maybe i was looking for the other shoe when i found it, so what!?)

what do you think? do i dare hold out and risk missing my chance to get a hold of this runner up? or will it always feel like a runner up? or really - who cares? i guess i need to stop caring, and hope in some small way getting this out to the blogosphere will help me rest.

color inspiration - the starting point

at some point last year i stumbled upon this look book from denim brand current/elliot and fell in love with the washed out denim, sun burnt weeds and faded blacktop pallet.

when we first began talking about having a fall wedding at the farm in Maine i had visions of flowy hippie gowns, yellowed grass, and baby's breath and queen ann's lace as far as the eye could see. I've since tweaked my vision, but i do still wish i could pop into the world of these images and hang out for an afternoon.

bad bridesmaid dresses

I'm in a bit of a goofy mood, and i happen to be bridesmaid dress shopping for Mike's sister's wedding tomorrow morning so i thought, let's enjoy some of the worst of the worst.

I have to say I've been lucky in the bridesmaid dress department for the most part (aside from wearing butter yellow, it wasn't the dress it was a color anyone would have struggled to pull off, especially a blondie with translucent skin like me.) So here's to making it through the wedding years without too many bad bridesmaid dresses.
My mom's girls wore something very close to the blue one on the left, floppy hat and all, though it's vintage enough I kinda like it again.

This one could be Kelly Kapowski's prom dress.
shiny+ crinkly= amazing

how do you solve a problem like maria?

thanks to uglydress.com for the inspiration and the laughs.

dress dilemma

im sure im not the first, but i am having some major post purchase dress stress. like wake up in the morning and think "did i really just have a dream about a wedding dress?" stress. i really dont think im a bridezilla, and im not a fashionista or a clothes hound or anything. im a pretty normal jeans and t-shirt wearing girl.

so, when i started dress shopping i did what most blog obsessed bride to be's do. I found the dresses i've been drooling over on line in a few boutiques, tried them on and quickly discovered that the ones i thought i loved didn't work for me. with that out of the way i could try on freely without any expectations. I discovered early on that, one - all bridal gowns are beautiful and therefore look beautiful on, and two - there is a lot more bling on everything than it looks like through the computer monitor.

Anywho after a few boutiques, lots of dresses, and very few in the maybe pile Mom and I headed to David's to make some major progress in the hunt. I tried on at least a dozen, and in the midst it happened. A dress that I pulled from a section other than the one i was searching in, just because i likes the detail, made me feel beautiful. I found myself dancing up and down the corridor of mirrors, imagining the flowy gown against the green fields of the farm where our wedding is going to be. It wasn't what i was looking for, it isnt what i expected and I don't have any idea if it is "me."

It's a preview gown so I can't find any photos to obsess over on the web, and to top it all off i feel like i am being constantly judged by other friends who are getting married with unlimited budgets and are having couture one of a kind gowns made just for them. It makes me want to cry, it makes me feel like David's is a dirty word,and more than anything, second guess my dress.

Is it just because it isn't what i expected? Why am i having such a hard time with this? Whenever i put it on i'm a happy girl- does everyone second guess?

...for the full affect..

whichgoose, maker of my beloved hippie crowns has posted this uber hippie video...



only problem now is I'm thinking I should wear my mom's dress, it fits the hippie mood much better than mine - oh what to do what to do!

hippie hair band heaven

Green Wedding Shoes posted a real wedding yesterday with a darling bride that donned and amazing head piece that is exactly what i was envisioning for my hippy-dippy farm wedding. I knew i didnt want to wear a veil, and was thinking about simple babys breathe in my hair - but these pretty little things from Etsy seller whichgoose are all I ever wanted and more. Now to decide which one i want or to dream up a custom piece. yay!ps. they are affordable too!